Entitled Couple Plans Destination Wedding, Gets Married Early in Secret Location and Fails to Tell Guests: 'It was too late to cancel our reservations'

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    r/weddingshaming • 14 hr. ago Far_Rhubarb7177 "You're invited to our wedding! Oh, never mind..."
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    My husband's niece, whom I will call "Jennifer", announced her engagement about 14 months before her wedding was to take place. It was to be a destination wedding, and the guests were advised to make all reservations early, as hotels, etc. at the locale would fill up quickly. So we went ahead and
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    reserved our hotel room, bought plane tickets, etc. About seven months before the scheduled wedding, we received a "Save The Date" card regarding the wedding; it reiterated the importance of booking everything ASAP, which we had already done anyway.
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    Then, about a month before the scheduled wedding, the father of the bride mentioned, in a VERY offhand manner, that Jennifer had gotten married during the previous weekend, albeit in a new destination and with a very scaled-down number of guests present. Until this point, we had never been apprised of any new developments
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    or changes to the original plans! No card, no email, NOTHING! And because we only learned the news after the fact, it was too late to cancel our reservations and/or change our flight. Consequently, we were out quite a bit of money! The thing is, I understand that that life happens, and sometimes plans change.
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    In this case, Jennifer and her beau actually had a valid reason(it's a long story) for doing what they did. But I DON'T understand why we weren't told about the change in plans before the actual new wedding took place! I think
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    even letting us and the other dis-invited know via a mass email would have been better than NO communication at all. Breach of etiquette, inconsiderate, and yes, Tacky!
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    Time_Act_3685 • 11h ago Yeeesh, what would have happened if you hadn't run into her dad? Or if he hadn't bothered to mention it? I wonder if there are still guests planning to go with no idea that the wedding is off now.
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    TootsNYC 10h ago • I got a save-the-date card for a cousin's daughter's wedding. I wrote it on the calendar, and at about 10 weeks before, I was talking to my mom and said I was trying to decide if I could afford to rent a car, and maybe I'd see if someone could pick me up at the airport and give me a lift. And that this would affect how many days off I requested.
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    My mom said, "You should call your cousin; I think that wedding has been canceled." So I pinged her, and indeed it had. Like...you put yourself on my calendar. But your situation is infinitely worse. Did you go on vacation anyway? How many people did she sting with that? Did she ever apologize?
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    Obrina98 10h ago • Since the trip is non-refundable, just go for vacation. It'll probably be more fun without the wedding BS.
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    FeatherDust11 • 11h ago That is absurd. They should be compensating their guests. I can't imagine doing something so incredibly and selfish.
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    HappyLucyD 10h ago Is it possible the original wedding is still on?? How are they going to explain this to people who show up? I'm so baffled as to how someone can be this .....! I'd try to get credits instead of a refund. and see if I can book a vacation when I would have been at the wedding, then post pics and tag them telling them my vacation is their gift...
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    MidiReader • 11h ago I hope you didn't send a gift
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    AmylnCO .10h ago I mean why lose the money? Might as well go on the trip anyway.
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    Speakinmymind96 • 10h ago Hopefully the 'wedding' destination is somewhere you would like to travel to , sorry it happened to anyways...this you. A "Save the Date" is supposed to be part of the invitation process, where you give additional planning time to people to work their calendars and finances around being in attendance. It's not an 'FYI we are planning a wedding' where
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    they are sent out to everyone you know and then scaled back later based on your finances/venue limits, without any regard for the cost and inconvenience caused when you drop potential guests from the invite list after they have made plans and booked non-refundable travel and lodging.
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    KiraiEclipse 9h ago Are you sure the celebration you were invited to isn't happening anymore? Have you asked the bride? If not, it's entirely possible she got legally married early for whatever "long story" reasons you mentioned earlier but still wants to have the wedding they originally planned.
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    Live-Tomorrow-4865 10h ago That was incredibly inconsiderate! Wow. It's fine that the wedding had to happen. sooner; life happens and people are understanding. But, telling people more than once that this was the destination/date, and encouraging the booking of airline tickets and accomodations, and not immediately, like, the day it was decided that
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    particular wedding was not happening, and not sending out an immediate mass email, plus a social media post or more than one, plus calling/texting people about it, was dereliction of duty. Hope you still used the tickets and had fun!!
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    Just Married...

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